For almost 10 years, I had an active gambling addiction. I haven’t gambled since June of 2012 — 14 years now — but the story of how I got there, and how I finally got out, is one I’ve never told in this kind of depth before.
In this first entry of my new There and Back Again Video Diary Series, I’m going back to those years: the impulsivity, the debt, the lying, the stealing, the moments I genuinely didn’t think I’d live to see 25. And I’m doing something I couldn’t have done without my late-in-life Autism and ADHD diagnosis — I’m looking at all of it through a new lens.
Because a lot of what looked like recklessness? Was an unregulated nervous system reaching for the only thing that made it feel alive.
This video is raw. It’s uncomfortable. And I hope it makes some of you feel a little less alone.
🔒 *Full video available to paid subscribers only.*
