Those commenting "always sick" frame chronic illness as a personality trait rather than as the body keeping receipts. The fact is, you're chronically sick in a system that asks you to perform consistency anyway, and now finally letting your nervous system run at its actual pace is revealing what was always there underneath the override. The slowing-down didn't cause this surge, it just stopped masking it. And most people just don't understand that. Sending you care 💚.
I hear you and see you. There is something very scary about slowing down because as our lives get a little quieter (good for the body, perhaps challenging for the rest), it's easy to feel bombarded by all the symptoms (and the thoughts associated with those symptoms) to get even louder. It's like what we need the most is often terrifying. Also, no news to anyone in this space, but I just need to commiserate about how utterly exhausting it is to go to appointments!
oh sheesh, we have a similar pile-up of conditions. And folks wonder why we swear a lot! As for the cost, I am deeply grateful that I moved back to NZ after decades away, where there is a public health system. There is better and faster care privately but beggars/choosers etc
In a country that actually cares about its people, where health care is a right instead of a privilege, I ended up in an emergency room Monday night and it cost me $25,000
Oh, Patrick. This is so poignant, and so painful. And I hear these stories so much from the clients in my therapy practice, and have lived it myself (although not nearly to the extent you have). I hear your pain, your despair, your anger, your struggles just to keep going. I wish I could just wrap you in a hug, go with you to your appointments and take notes for you and advocate for you, and go into Congress and kick some ass and take names until we get this kind of stuff covered. And maybe into some medical schools as well.
There's no reason why you would know me, but I'm a devoted listener to Divergent Conversations and follow you and Megan Anna, as well as Dr Houser and others. Not just because you know so much and have experienced so much, but because the rawness and humanity you bring to these conversations is so deeply validating for so many people. Including me.
I too, as an AuDHD practice owner and (I guess, kind of) unwilling entrepreneur by necessity, face many of these cycles. And I too have faced chronic, baffling health conditions since childhood, though at nothing close to the level of severity you describe. Ask anyone who knows me what I'm most likely to say if they ask how I'm doing, and the unanimous guess will be some version of "tired" or "exhausted." I'm constantly skating on the edge of burnout, and sometimes falling through the ice completely.
You know as well as I do that there's no good answer to this. Subtractive recovery is all well and good. And, bills have to get paid, food has to be bought, and life is just getting faster, louder, and more expensive.
I'm not going to insult you with platitudes. I'll just offer to be like Winnie and Christopher Robin, going to visit Eeyore. So you don't have to be alone. And anytime you want a change of scenery, you're welcome to come to Southern Oregon and crash in our house. I have extra rooms, with two boys now off at college, and my wife who is Peruvian is an awesome cook (they're kind of obsessed with food). The area is much like Asheville, minus the humidity. And I know an awesome integrative medicine doctor here, although her wait list is sometimes long.
Sending you hugs and companionship and gratitude, for all that you offer to the world... as well as the courage of stepping back and just being, and giving the rest of us implicit permission and a role model for doing the same.
i am struggling with chronic fatigue, brain fog, & depression. i cope with smoking weed. i wish i cud feel better. xo hadas
💚💚💚
Those commenting "always sick" frame chronic illness as a personality trait rather than as the body keeping receipts. The fact is, you're chronically sick in a system that asks you to perform consistency anyway, and now finally letting your nervous system run at its actual pace is revealing what was always there underneath the override. The slowing-down didn't cause this surge, it just stopped masking it. And most people just don't understand that. Sending you care 💚.
Facts. 💯
Thank you for writing to openly about what you struggle with, makes me feel less alone
Keeping up with medical appointments and repeat prescriptions is indeed becoming a full time job
💚💚💚
I hear you and see you. There is something very scary about slowing down because as our lives get a little quieter (good for the body, perhaps challenging for the rest), it's easy to feel bombarded by all the symptoms (and the thoughts associated with those symptoms) to get even louder. It's like what we need the most is often terrifying. Also, no news to anyone in this space, but I just need to commiserate about how utterly exhausting it is to go to appointments!
Completely agree 💯
oh sheesh, we have a similar pile-up of conditions. And folks wonder why we swear a lot! As for the cost, I am deeply grateful that I moved back to NZ after decades away, where there is a public health system. There is better and faster care privately but beggars/choosers etc
In a country that actually cares about its people, where health care is a right instead of a privilege, I ended up in an emergency room Monday night and it cost me $25,000
💕💕
Oh, Patrick. This is so poignant, and so painful. And I hear these stories so much from the clients in my therapy practice, and have lived it myself (although not nearly to the extent you have). I hear your pain, your despair, your anger, your struggles just to keep going. I wish I could just wrap you in a hug, go with you to your appointments and take notes for you and advocate for you, and go into Congress and kick some ass and take names until we get this kind of stuff covered. And maybe into some medical schools as well.
There's no reason why you would know me, but I'm a devoted listener to Divergent Conversations and follow you and Megan Anna, as well as Dr Houser and others. Not just because you know so much and have experienced so much, but because the rawness and humanity you bring to these conversations is so deeply validating for so many people. Including me.
I too, as an AuDHD practice owner and (I guess, kind of) unwilling entrepreneur by necessity, face many of these cycles. And I too have faced chronic, baffling health conditions since childhood, though at nothing close to the level of severity you describe. Ask anyone who knows me what I'm most likely to say if they ask how I'm doing, and the unanimous guess will be some version of "tired" or "exhausted." I'm constantly skating on the edge of burnout, and sometimes falling through the ice completely.
You know as well as I do that there's no good answer to this. Subtractive recovery is all well and good. And, bills have to get paid, food has to be bought, and life is just getting faster, louder, and more expensive.
I'm not going to insult you with platitudes. I'll just offer to be like Winnie and Christopher Robin, going to visit Eeyore. So you don't have to be alone. And anytime you want a change of scenery, you're welcome to come to Southern Oregon and crash in our house. I have extra rooms, with two boys now off at college, and my wife who is Peruvian is an awesome cook (they're kind of obsessed with food). The area is much like Asheville, minus the humidity. And I know an awesome integrative medicine doctor here, although her wait list is sometimes long.
Sending you hugs and companionship and gratitude, for all that you offer to the world... as well as the courage of stepping back and just being, and giving the rest of us implicit permission and a role model for doing the same.
this is so beautifully written
So timely… don’t have the energy to respond more right now except to say I’m right here with you. ((((Hugs))))